#20
Whenever I'm depressed or in pain I masturbate. I'm never so sexually charged as when I'm suicidal. Wanking is a cure for mental illness and toothache. It should be prescribed free on the NHS.
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About Tristram Spencer
- Waiting For John
- Whilst waiting for John I pass my time staring at screen-savers, reading ingredient lists and old phone books. I encourage spam mail and try to make friends with the spammers. I count tiles, bricks and tins of soup and enjoy the sound of lawnmowers.
Others Waiting For John
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An Influx of Pigeons
Is there still some hope for the fated Mr Spencer?
The Dangerous Dandy by Barbara Cartland
Will Tristram finally be brought to account for his love of Babs? And: is 25 years hard labour enough?
Brian the Postboy's gift to John: an ankle bracelet inscribed 'Super Dong'
Scrap metal or has John been 'tagged'. Is Tristram Spencer really the only fated man in town?
Trolley Dash August 2010
Did Tristram accidently pick up a REAL bargain?
Tristram's Birthday: Sunday 3rd October
Cheap jam sponge or something a little more exciting? How will Mr Spencer celebrate his 32nd year in hell?
What John purchased on the 15th July
A Flamingo flower. Expensive ashtray or is John getting 'green fingers'???
Garden Centre 21st June.
Tristram buys 10 ugly green window boxes and a variety of plants.
Leaflet put through Tristram's door: Church Fete 23rd June 2010.
One to mark down in the diary???
What Tristram saw on the 5th June
Tristram's Reported Death 13th May
Significant? maybe...
Tristram's Dream from the 9th May
Significant????
My Loose Thread by Dennis Cooper
The Start of it All
Abigail Winthrope (Mrs) and The Nerdettes are the creation of Joseph Mills. All words for this player are written by him. Click Abigail's pic to find out more about Joe.
Sometimes Thy Don't Come Back
Various artists and writers represent 'loss' in unique ways.
Labels
- Celebrity Suicide Notes
- Introduction of Abigail Winthrope (comments section)
- Introduction of Brian The Postboy (1)
- Introduction of Brian The Postboy (2)
- Introduction of Dr. Dennis
- Introduction of Jaws
- Introduction of Mother
- Introduction of my unfortunate Brother
- Introduction of Steve The Spammer (Princess Agipoki)
- Introduction of the Postman
- Introduction of Verity
- The first ever post
- Tristram and John: how they met
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hot...and true.
ReplyDeleteinteresting
ReplyDeleteme too!
ReplyDeleteI too am a fan of that ancient cure for everything.
ReplyDeleteIt helps to love one's work.
Is it true that if I masturbate too much, I'll go blind?? I'm starting to get worried because when I looked @ this pic in your blog, well, see for yourself . . . Click Here
ReplyDelete@ Anon: Me? lol You ain*t seen me. I'm no where near as good looking as my avatar! X
ReplyDelete@ asexual: Congratulations... don't forget to wear a condom; safe sex an all that; X
@ Wannabe: I take it you do it too? X
@ Jason: I'm thinking salad dressing Jason!!! It*s quite exciting... lol. X
@ David: Yep, you've been going at it a little too hard. During my teen years I lost my sight 15,657 times. Poor boy. :) X
that is true, too...lol
ReplyDeleteIt's been my favorite treatment for a multitude of conditions. Sometimes a few times a day!
ReplyDelete